Be Kind to Your Mind
Often, trying to be kind to your mind is way down on our list of priorities and with the fast pace of the modern world, our emotional needs can be overlooked. Here are some simple ideas and considerations for living a life where you feel better about yourself and are kind to yourself- both through words and actions.
Be mindful:
“Surrender to what is. Let go of what was. Have faith in what will be.“
Sonia Ricotti
Sometimes life is just not nice to us! And it really is OK to admit this. It is good to be positive but sometimes it is healthy and necessary to just sit with the true emotions we are feeling without trying to ‘get over it’ and find a positive spin. It is OK to feel upset, angry, hard done by, jealous, guilty, joyful, happy, knowing that feelings will and do change.
A colleague of mine recently coined a lovely phrase, when it all gets too much, she allows herself a good ‘power cry’. Allow the feelings and then allow yourself to move on from them.
Try this! If you’re having a bad day, write down how you are honestly feeling. When you have finished destroy it, rip it up, stamp on it or throw it in the fire and watch while it is consumed by the flames and disappears – it feels really good!
The gift of time:
“Self-love is not so vile a sin, as self-neglecting.”
Shakespeare
The pace of life we live! Remember it is important to take time out just to be in the present moment. This can take its form in many ways, for example a 5 minute meditation or other relaxation techniques, a bath, reading a book, a walk, some exercise, a massage etc. Whatever is your ‘you time’ it is important to regularly schedule it into your life. One of my favourite things to do is get out into nature and look at the beauty of the world. This gives me thinking time and makes me feel really peaceful.
Try this! Take some time to meditate. There are many excellent apps for this, including Calm , or if you have an Apple watch use Breathe. For some ideas of easy breathing exercises to help with this.
Be your own best friend:
“Talk to yourself like you would to someone you love.”
Brene Brown
Having harsh, unkind responses to our own actions and feelings can unfortunately come very naturally to us- we can be our own worst enemies. You may suffer with imposter syndrome. You wouldn’t speak to someone you love and respected that way, so why do it to yourself? Challenge the negative commentary with a more positive alternative, so ‘I look dreadful,’ might be challenged with ‘I like my outfit today’. Try to learn to love yourself and be more body confident.
Try this: It may feel uncomfortable at first, but saying a positive affirmation to yourself in front of the mirror is a powerful way of challenging thoughts too, something like, ‘I am loved’, or ‘I love me’. It becomes less of a cringe the more your practise!
Gift yourself:
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance .”
Oscar Wilde
Treating yourself with kindness is so important. Love yourself, looking for the positives in the way you act, look and go through life. Treat others as you wish to be treated, and expect the same.
Try this! Give yourself a gift! This can be as generous as is suitable to you and your budget but should be something that you really value. This is particularly important when you have really challenged yourself- reward your achievements. Choose something you love, perhaps a new outfit from Styleaisle, some pamper products or a pamper day at home with a new book? For me this is always a massage, reflexology treatment or spa experience!
Detox your relationships:
“I will not let anyone walk through my mind with their dirty feet.”
Ghandi
At times it can be easier not to challenge bad behaviour from those around us in the quest for a quiet life. Why is it we listen more to one critical voice than a chorus of positive, loving, comments? Chose to spend your time with positive influences in your life rather than the toxic relationships; those which make you feel considered and appreciated. Challenge toxic relationships and bad or rude behaviour from those around you by not giving them your energy or time. Take your self-value from those who encourage you, inspire you and care about you.
Try this! Expect others to treat you as you treat them . Think about, who really makes you feel good in your life? Why is this? What do they do that you value? Perhaps you could tell them?
Reach out:
“Thank goodness for the good souls that make life better.”
Starsailor
Life isn’t always joyful. Sadly bad things happen to good people, sometimes the best people. If it’s someone you know reach out to them and simply let them know you care by simply making a call or sending a message.
If it’s you, it’s OK to draw the wagons round for a while but try not to stay shut off for long. Even though we don’t see loved ones or friends, they are there for us. Don’t be afraid to let them in.
If you are needing to self-isolate so cannot reach out, be sure to develop routines to help with feelings of loneliness. Help if you are feeling lonely here.
Try this! Separate the ‘fair weather’ friends from the true ones by thinking about who it is you want to confide in or talk to when you are experiencing a challenging time? They are the souls to hold on to.
Let yourself be happy:
“You yourself, as much as anyone in the entire universe deserve your love and affection.”
Buddah
Give yourself permission to be happy. It is OK to find your ‘happy’ wherever, whenever and however feels right for you. Some people love to socialise lots, some like to stay in, some like to be in the countryside, some like to be in the city – be proud of whatever it is that makes you happy and be true to yourself. Don’t be afraid to say ‘no’ and do your thing! Be respectful of difference also and enjoy the rich diversity of people’s life choices all around you.
Try this! Say something kind, to those around and most importantly to your true, valuable and precious self.
Be kind to your mind:
Please comment and share the ways you find your ways to be kind to your mind.
Further reading:
This lovely read is a reflective message to a younger self and an important take on self-esteem.
A quiet afternoon to sit back and reflect on the things that have been happening in life is a wonderful way to find peace. Looking out at a sunny field or the ocean waves often leaves my mind empty, and there is nothing so sweet as that eternal silence!
Wonderful reminders here and it doesn’t matter how much we know these things we have to be reminded – why is that? Thankyou for sharing
How important being kind to ourselves is! We always preach kindness towards others and take care of others, but often neglect ourselves!
I love a good Detox of relationships. I think that space can be just what someone needs to appreciate them more.
I have a tendency not to challenge bad behaviour. I have however started removing adults from my life that have a tendency to be overly negative and find fault in everyone other than themselves.
It’s really a challenge to understand your own emotions and be able to process them. I often treat myself to spa days or small treats, when I accomplish big tasks.
Be kind to your mind. Those are such powerful words. It’s so difficult to break old habits and cycles but being patient with change is also an important reminder.
I love how you are leading others to be kind to themselves with a list of actionable “tasks”. I’ve done all on this list but I am overdue for a spa day (due to pandemic).
Such a powerful post reminding us to love ourselves and not feel guilty to take time off to do just that.
These are all such great points. We really need to take care of our mental health and I like your ideas.
I love this post, it’s a great reminder to people who need to hear this. Loving yourself and taking care of your mind is such an important thing people overlook these days. Thanks for sharing!
What a wonderful reminder. We ll need more kindness in the world. Thanks for sharing.
You’re right that sometimes life isn’t nice to us and we have to think about ourselves. Treating ourselves kindly and having a treat or gift when things get tough can work so well, esp if it’s something relaxing like a spa day x